Progress: Derailment, Disappointment & Determination

      Sometimes progress, from the outside view, doesn't look as though it is occurring.  I think that pretty much sums up the Martin Middle School photojournalism project.  Our team has had its own hurdles to jump as we have conflicting schedules and unexpected events, which often interfere. We have all experienced frustration of  trying to coordinate times to gather to work on the project.  Just add the dynamics of a school to that - rules, regulations, testing, and miscommunication among the staff.

      BUT, today was the day that we were going to meet with the kids, get their cameras, and talk about the pictures they took.  The best laid plans of men, or in this case, women!  We arrived at the school anticipating a wonderful day!   We knew going in that our regular contact person was out, but had made arrangements for us to meet the academic advisor.  We checked in and headed to the library to meet her and the kids.  We sat and sat.  Finally, after 45 minutes, she arrived and we chatted about our needs/plans with the kids.  The kids came in....no cameras..well, one young man had remembered his cameras.  The other girls had not received the cameras and two of the other kids had left theirs at home.

      So, derailment followed by discouragement followed by despair.  Not really, but it could have been that way.  I dug to the depth of my positive thinking today and reminisced, once again, about how we learn the most in the difficult things.  As frustrating as it is spending so much time on something that never seems to come to fruition, it isn't a life or death situation.  One would only hope this is the worse thing in life they have to face.

      I am reminded that we desire to produce a piece of work for the school and to have something for them; however, it is quite possible that won't happen.  What will happen though is five women will learn more about themselves, developing a project, working with others and the challenging experiences we encountered.  What has struck me over the past few months has been the disjointed and disconnected communication.  It is interesting how you can develop relationships with people in a community and yet when the players change, often you have to go back to the beginning.  I fee this has been a significant challenge in our semester at Martin.  The players have changed and we move forward rebuilding and gaining ground.  What will that look like in terms of a photojournalism project? I am unsure.  For me, it is a reminder that we can plan but we have to be sensitive to remind ourselves that we are not in control.

   

      The most difficult part of today was not about the kids not remembering to bring their cameras; it was about one camera we had to give and two girls who needed cameras.  Trying to make that decision was excruciating.  The teacher finally chose a number and one of the girls walked away with a camera.  Truly, it broke my heart.  We will bring her a camera on Monday but it made me think about exclusion and how it happens in the most subtle ways.  And then it happens in bigger ways and impacts the lives of children, families, and neighborhoods. We fight for the rights of others, battling against oppression and then in an instant, you can become the oppressor.  It is really scary when you consider how easily this can happen.  Lessons learned.